More on sex and intimacy!

Good morning Mamas & Papas!

I read in a recent blog post that a recent topic of
conversation at the mamaspapas blog had to do with love and
intimacy. As a trained sex educator and facilitator of
sexuality/sensuality-focused writing workshops, I am
familiar with the kinds of issues that arise for many folks
around sexuality and intimacy—not the least of which, for
parents, has to do with, of course, the ways in which one’s
sense of oneself as a sexual *being* changes so radically
upon welcoming a child into one’s life/heart/self.

As someone who is preparing for the journey toward
parenthood, this has been on my mind for a long time.
Because I’m a survivor of sexual trauma, my understanding of
my sexuality has undergone many transformations. What’s in
store for my body, my desire, my relationship(s) as I step
up into this new arena?

I started the Declaring Our Erotic writing workshops five
years ago as a place where survivors could come together and
write openly about our full and complicated erotic lives –
and as these workshops have opened to all writers (not just
those who are survivor-identified), I (and others!) have
been deeply impacted by the writing that moms in the
workshops have risked sharing. If we don’t take the
opportunity to express all the hidden desires, the struggles
and worries and longings, even as we’re celebrating each new
aspect of our lives, we risk shutting down intensely
important parts of ourselves. We must nurture our adult
selves (meaning non-parent, although can we ever be
non-parents again?), as separate from if ever intricately
woven alongside our parent selves, in order to be most
completely *in* our lives…

I welcome your thoughts and comments!

(submitted by Jen www.writingourselveswhole.org)